The more things change, the more they stay the same

Roadtrips are great. Of course, for me it isn't a roadtrip without a detour to Chapters and Starbucks. I get my half sweet Machiatto grande and browse away. I have a path I follow from the Starbucks to the magazines (checking to see if a new issue of Dolls Quarterly is available), then I head to the craft section to check out new books on doll making, quilting and more. Behind the craft section is the wine and cooking section, last time I picked up a wine diary so I could record my favorites. Interesting or coincendence, I am not sure which, but the exercise section is next to the food. Hmmm. Well I stroll through there too as I take a sip of my coffee - by now it is cool enough to drink. There are so many experts on healthy living. I don't need anymore books from that department. I'll just listen to Big G. "Calories out have got to be more than calories in, it's that simple". After hitting the Bestsellers wall and the children's area I make my way to the Clearance section. Every once in awhile you find a treasure here. And this day was a treasure day indeed.

The Heretic's Daughter by Kathleen Kent, hardcover for $7.99. I had been eyeing this book for awhile now and here it was in the clearance section. I had to have it. Heretic's Daughter would be a great read to put on my summer list. With my prize in hand I was officially done browsing and off to the checkout.

Well, that was a few weeks ago. I spent the weekend at the cottage reading the story of Martha Carrier and then googled her name to see how much of the story was true. Although the front page had the disclaimer that it was a work of fiction, Google told me otherwise. Kent took the few manuscripts of her ancestry and filled in the blanks for the rest of us. Weaving a tale so true that it had me captivated for 3 days. It's amazing what a little thread of gossip can spin into and the destruction it can have.

Fast forward 300 years. I grew up in a small town where gossip spread faster than wildfire. Moving to the city, I end up in the burbs again and here the gossip is so thick I can barely wade through some days. Although, there are no daily hangings, the words of a few idle people can wreck the lives of those around them. Do they know what their words do? Have they got a clue? No I don't think so because if they were that smart, they wouldn't speak so ill of each other.

I like books that make me think.Think about where we are today. All the advancements and changes and yet human nature has not caught up with the times. No we still act the same way we did, 50, 300, 2000 yrs ago. We may think we are more civilized but are we really? Oh yes, our styles of punishment may have changed, a little more humane, but how we act toward our enemy, even worse how we act toward our friend or family has not changed a bit. You'd think we could improve on that, wouldn't you?

Weighing Pros and Cons.

I woke up Saturday morning with a "can do" attitude and decided I was going to run 10 K. I have been running regularly every other day and doing my strength training as well. Usually logging 2 or 3 miles each run. When Saturday morning dawned, I felt like I could do it and go twice the distance. I enjoyed my morning coffee and read for a bit, let my breakfast digest and then headed to the treadmill. That's right, the treadmill. I know, I know. It is not the same as running outside. But like everything else I weigh the pros and cons before I make my decisions and the treadmill wins everytime. Let's see. The Pros of running outside hmmm? Changing scenery and fresh air. Ah, but wait fresh air is a con too. After one mile outside, I am wheezing more than a broken squeeker toy. The con list seems to grow quickly. There is the fact that the hills are harder. Well the whole darn run is harder with the incline constantly changing. Oh and let's look at form, ummm let's not. I am about as graceful as Big Bird running down Sesame Street, not exactly what I want the neighbors to see. 

Another con, I can't leave little g home alone. So running on the tread allows me to get my run at a relatively decent hour and dinner in the oven before Big G gets home for the night.  Hey, that would be a pro for the treadmill. Also, the tread will track my mileage and pace as well as the number of calories burned. I know these are going to be off a bit because the tread doesn't account for my height, weight or age but at least it is a good gauge. I am able to keep track of my progress and I always try to improve on my time or my distance. Running on the tread saves me the need for sunscreen. I can look out the window and see Mr. Sun quit nicely.  With all this rainy weather lately, I don't have any excuses when I run on the treadmill. And I can pop in a movie or get caught up on Young & The Restless. Of course, the volume is off because I have a great running playlist to keep me moving. But really do you need to hear what they are saying on Y & R? I mean, their actions speak pretty loudly.
So, the next time someone tells me "running on the treadmill is not the same, you should be outside in the fresh air" I am gonna look at him (yes, it was a him who said it) and say "well, at least I ran!"

For the record. I ran 10K on Saturday, not for any other reason but just to say "because I can".


The letter W is brought to you today by ABC Wednesday

Curriculum Vitae

To Whom It may concern:
Please accept my resume for review for the positon of Superheroine. My educational background will show you that the 12 years of public school equipped me with the skills to fight against bullies within my peer group as well as the authority figures who thought they could rule with an iron fist and absolute abuse of the great powers that were bestowed upon them. In the late 80's I accepted a full scholarship program at the Boyfriends Gone Bad School For Girls, where I was fully immersed in the "kicked to the curb" program.I gained a valuable skill set which can be applied to almost any scoundrel, cheat or liar. Upon graduation, I set out to save the world.
While I had the heart and mind of a Superheroine, my superpowers needed some mastering, so I did a bit of contract work to hone my skills and expertise. You may have read about me in the Times, or the Inquirer. I have a  strong moral code, including a willingness to risk one's own safety in the service of good without expectation of reward or accolade. I am motivated, have a sense of responsibility. Unlike other superheros I do not have a personal vendetta against criminals, I believe they will have to answer one day for their actions. I do share with them the strong belief in justice and humanitarian service.
By day, I wear the disguise of a do it all mom who is seeking to find her mark by starting her own business.
Multi tasking comes natural to me. My secret powers? Well, they will remain a secret, for now. Should I meet your approval I would by all means give you a demonstration. I am blessed with eyes in the back of my head. Luckily, my long hair hides them. A goal of mine, that I have been working on for sometime, to be able to be at multiple places at the same time. This eludes me, yet I am optimistic that I will achieve my goal one day. Most of the time I am very serious and  task oriented, however I have a comedic side to my personality, which has been useful at times in mentally disarming the enemy. I always say "laugh at yourself first, then it doesn't hurt so much when others laugh at you!" Some may say I am intimidating, others would say I know what I want. Either way, I set a goal and I accomplish it. My alter ego is sweet and admiring, I on the other hand shoot more from the hip and call it like I see it. This can cause my tongue to be quick and rather cutting. I tend to be cautious using this ability only when necessary as I have learned, words are like toothpaste, once they spill out of your mouth you can never put them back in. I waste no time in getting the job done. Less talk more action, is what this world needs. Be sure, your adversary will quake when they discover I am on their trail.
I am enjoy the life I have now, so many masks I have to wear. Adding another mask to my wardrobe would only make it more colourful. I accept new challenges with gusto and a "BAM! KER POW!!" attitude. The anonymity of your want ad intrigued me.
While I have eradicated many of my archvillain's minions, I do realize that true evil is always lurking around the corner and I will not stop until peace and prosperity are extended to all. If this sounds like the right hero for you please contact me. Send a note by secret messenger to the house at the end of  Main Street. Look for the window with the candle lit at both ends. My faithful sidekick will see that the note reaches me and I will come at once.

Until then,
Miss Marvelous


In response to Sunday Scribblings #219 Superhero. I had fun with this. It seems that the prompts are always so timely. I've been hearing a lot lately about my daughter and how she looks up to me, like I am a superhero. Flattering but hard to live up to. Today, I went into her gr. 4 class to talk to them because she'd been boasting on my super skills at dollmaking - a skill that will supposedly help in their art project of making puppets. The teacher was skeptic until she saw my dolls. Now I am under pressure to make the bodies for 20 puppets in the next 2 days. No problem for this superhero. I may not be saving the world but to the gr.4's I am saving their puppets.  I'll take it.

Two Different Faces

I just finished reading Shanghai Girls by Lisa See, and really enjoyed it. The book follows the lives of two sisters, Pearl and May, through life and love. When I finished the book I started thinking about the relationship I have with my siste. My oldest sister moved out when I was 10 yrs old. I didn't really get to know her until my mid 20's. But Susan and I were like two peas in a pod. She is only 11 months older than me. I began drawing several parallels between Pearl and May and Susan and me.
One known for her beauty, one known for her wit and smarts. I was in the shadows, always a step back. She was the favoured one. She was the one who got to play sports, she had all the popular boys chase her, won the beauty pagaents.
I am not sure how she felt about me. I was the baby -the little bambino with all the dark hair.  Being the older one, she got the new bigger room when our older sister moved away. I was thrilled the day she moved out of our room,and yet I would crawl into her bed everytime I had a bad dream (that was most nights). She hated that and would only give the very edge of the bed to sleep on. I didn't care, I felt so safe there beside her. I loved to share our clothes, Susan hated me going into her closet or borrowing her pretty things.

I am sure Susan had some complaints about me. Petty jealouslies even. I was shocked when she voiced the complaint about my first boyfriend in university. "He has blond hair!. Ann never dates a guy with blond hair! She is trying to find a guy that looks like my Todd!" I was shocked and surprised to hear these words. No I didn't want a boy that looked like her man. And the relationship with the blond lasted a very, very short time. And yes, I do prefer brunettes, which I never realised until that moment.
Although we would fight, no argue or squabble sounds more like it, we were best friends. Defending each other to the ends of the earth. Laugh and play until Mom would yell "you two, go to sleep". We worked at the same jobs. We would play tricks on our friends by switching the phone back and forth from me to her (no one could tell can tell our voices apart). We were known as "the Smith girls". The first time I knew how much she loved me was when she put my name down for Miss Congenality in the local pagaent (She was the only one who put my name down). And then when she offered to help us be parents -finding us a clinic, offering to help with the costs. She is one of my biggest encouragers and supporters.
Although we live in different countries, nothing can break the bond between us. When we are together, it is like we were never separated and we pick up where left off.
I could go on and on about all the trouble we used to get into together, the many nights of playing kick the can in the neighbors yard, the rivalries and little things she has done to show me how much she loves me but then I would have to write a book.

Bite your tongue

Last night I attended a very productive meeting. A group of forward thinking entrepreneurs in the Valley are planning an event. I can't always say meetings are productive but this one was. The ladies should be applauded for that. It is not easy getting eleven A-type women to have a productive meeting. There were good discussions, some playing devil's advocate (in my opinion that is good, as you need to see all sides of a situation before making a sound decision), some waiting until the room went quiet before they spoke - so polite. And then there was me. (I've got a feeling Tammy may include herself in there with me too).

I came home with my hand over my mouth and my inner voice telling me I should have kept it shut a little more. I can be so outspoken. I go to these meetings thinking "okay Ann, be a sponge. Less talking, more listening." But then, I will hear something that gets me spurred on. Good or bad it doesn't matter, my leg will start twitching, my arm will start fighting with itself - up/ done/ up/ done. My tongue is tensed up like it is trying to lifts dumbells in my mouth and out it blurts. My interjection/ objection/ declaration what have you. I just can't hold my tongue any longer. I can't help it. I am passionate. I speak with conviction and I always want to make sure that whatever decision we make is the best decision.

I came home around 10pm and plunked down into my red chair (it is the best chair for plunking down in). I look over at Big G and the only thing he says as he lowers his head and raises his eyebrows is "What did you say???" I laughed because he knows me so well.

It's not that I was fired up with anger about the meeting, no, it was passion I expressed as I shared all the details with my love. I got to reminiscing about the old days when my father would come home from a board meeting for "this" or a town council meeting for "that". I remember him and Mom in the kitchen sharing a cup of tea and listening to Dad speak with such passion about the events "Well, I told them this and if they thought otherwise, they could just do ...". back then I used to get mad, because my 10 yr old body wanted to sleep but Dad's booming voice would always wake me.  Now, I smile. I am the spitting image of my father. And although I sometimes come home from meetings with my hand over my mouth wishing I hadn't said so much, I am also secretly happy that I don't.

As long as I have a voice I will use it. Someday it might be gone.


...in response to T is for by ABC Wednesday

I know I can

I have always loved the children's story "The Little Engine that Could". Those words have echoed in my ears for the past 41 yrs. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can. About 6 years ago a friend sent me a note of encouragement and on it was just the reference to a verse out of the Bible. Philippians 4:13. I will never forget the note or the verse. It has become my mantra. For me, it was what I needed to get over my mountain. And whenever I doubt myself, my strength or perseverance those words come to mind.

I love the attitude of the little blue engine. After only a moments hesitation he said " I think I can, I think I can, I think I can." Could it be that someone had shared that verse with the little blue engine?

I don't preach it very often, but I can't ignore the One True Thing "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" Phil 4:13 NIV


in response to Sunday Scribblings weekly challenge #217 Mantra